Something

How come that everything feels the same. Can't tell the difrence anymore. Dont know if it's a solid rock hanging there, if its desperation for something better or if it's maybe just the feeling of butterflies. Tierd of going around in cirkels, feeling this way and feeling lonley. Attentionwhore. Thats not what I want and thats where I'm hedding. Tragic but true.

What if you can't tell what is what or who to trust? Lost is the right word. A lost attentionwhore. Hmm thats worth ree thinking. But how can you change something if youre lost? I don't know. Maybe just maybe it will change now in the "New" beginning. But as a true pessimist, I seriously doubt the fact but who knows.

No one truly and fully knows whats going on inhere. Trying to put it in words just makes it feel like it's so far from beeing done as it can be. When people go away and you cant cry or when everything is good and you can't smile and join the people around you, thats when the feeling of beeing lost kicks in the moast. Like it's a wall of glass between you and everyone. You can just sit there and show your teeth in a atempt for a fake smile. Sick of trying to be this...thing that no one understand, trying to make people understand and see many of them go even further away. Just give me something new so that I can walk away from this attentionwhore thing that has been created.

How can you learn to feel all those things again? can you? I dont enyoy beeing this coold boring attentionwhore. Just get me out of here. Far away so that i can forget. Then come back and carry on when everything is a little more sorted out. Well i'll have to carrie on, can't stop just beacuse of this. NO WAY. Only wish somone could show me how.

I'm tierd...just do damn tierd of this shit.


And don't ask why it ended up in english or expect my spelling an stuff to be right because it probably is far from perfect and I'm not much of a writer either.



Love you all suckers and don't go my way. You'll only end up lost or something...